Growth of life
I don’t believe in a balanced life, I believe in growth of life. If you try to balance, you’re limited, which is why I don’t believe in separating my work from personal interests. Between commuting, office hours, and responding to forgotten emails in the evening, we can dedicate 10+ hours of the day to our work. Why should you separate such a huge amount of time from who you are and what you love? If your work and life is separate, are you truly whole? I believe you should bring work to life because when you enjoy what you’re doing, you’re able to be who you are. Work shouldn’t make you feel like you’re in school and tasked with homework that you don’t want to do, because it’s not about trying to limit the number of hours, it’s about finding the joy in it.
Meditation is a part of my life, no matter where I am. One of the fundamentals of meditation is to visualize the person you love most. If I’m having a bad day or feeling a bit stressed, I close my eyes and think about my kids. I have a son and a daughter who fill my heart with amazing energy and have taught me a lot about selfless, unconditional love and how to enjoy life’s simple pleasures.
Learning is especially important when it comes to parenting because most times you don’t know if the choice you’re making is the right one. To learn from those who have done it before me, I regularly attended parenting conferences. I’ve found this technique I really like, which emphasizes how yelling at your kids rarely works. I took a vow of “yellibacy,” meaning I will not yell at my kids as an attempt to discipline them. The premise is similar to the approach teachers or doctors take when a child does well on a test or makes it through a needle without causing a scene. Kids love getting stickers when they do something right, or well, it’s like their milestone or their paycheck; most times they have a sticker book to present as a symbol of accomplishment. This technique takes a similar approach. If I yell at my kids, I don’t get a sticker. My daughter keeps me accountable and keeps me honest. If I raise my voice for whatever reason, she doesn’t give me a sticker, but she’ll reward me the next day with double stickers if I keep my cool. It’s these little things and those small opportunities to learn from everyone and everything around you that makes you a better parent and person.